Everyone Loves Pie

[Django]

A sweet, decadent aroma drifted from the door of the kitchen into Great Hall. Bending over to better reach her freshly-made pastry, a pretty black squirrel bit back a curse when she accidentally burned her paw in the hot oven. Removing the pie pan, Alne shut the oven door with her footpaw. She set the pie upon the windowsill to cool, turning her attention to another pie which was done baking in a second oven.

Despite her mild burn, Alne was excited. The cook had asked her to bake dessert for lunchtime today. It was only Alne's life dream to work in the kitchens of Redwall. She took out the second pie, humming a tune softly to herself. She went to set it on the windowsill next to the first pie, but something was horribly wrong. The first pie was gone!

Vanished. Disappeared. Simply not there.

"Strange," Alne murmured. She set the second pie on a counter inside the kitchens, hoping it would not suffer a similar fate. She climbed carefully onto the windowsill, looking every which way for the pie. Had it fallen? There were no pie guts on the ground outside, so that was not the case. Some beast must be playing a trick on her. With a mild scowl, she ducked back indoors, crossing her arms and glaring at the windowsill.

"Nae beast better be stealin' th' pies, ye ken?" she called loudly, her Highlander accent evident in her voice. "An' if ye can't wait fer lunch, ah've got plenny a' vittles in th' kitchen."

[Promatera]

The sun was shining brightly on Redwall as its inhabitants began to wake up and start their daily chores. The day looked to be promising for Leander. As usual he woke up, and after making his bed, walked off to the kitchens to start his daily routine of chores. Leander preferred avoiding free time and usually did any chore that presented itself to keep him busy. In fact the only time he seemed relaxed was when he was swimming, which was usually towards the evening, once most of the chores around Redwall had been finished.

In the kitchen, a pleasant aroma greeted Leander as he met Friar Julian, a squat dormouse with light brown fur who was in charge of all that went on in the abbey kitchens.

“Good morning,” Leander mumbled avoiding the Friar’s gaze.

“Ah! Just in time, Leander,” he spouted, “Today I just need you to check on the larder and make sure everything is in order while I check in on the cellars for a moment.”

Nodding, Leander entered quietly into the kitchens where he took notice a rather tall black squirrel grabbing a pie from one of the ovens. He was pretty sure he had seen her before, but he could not recall a name. Not wanting to embarrass himself if the two had met previously, Leander walked by silently and headed straight to the larder. However, just as he grabbed his pen, Leander heard the squirrel burst into a thick northern accent.

"Nae beast better be stealin' th' pies, ye ken? An' if ye can't wait fer lunch, ah've got plenny a' vittles in th' kitchen."

Leander was not only surprised by the sudden theft, but also by the squirrel’s strong accent. Memories of his younger days just arriving at the abbey after escaping returned to him. Recovering from the shock the attack left on him, Leander found it tough to converse and get along with the abbey dwellers. Even though he was treated politely he did not feel a sense of connection as he had with his tribe or with his parents. Leander greatly admired the abbey dwellers, but he had a sense of not belonging. Most beasts living in the abbey had known each other for most of their lives, but from out of the blue here was Leander. A strange new beast who was an oddity of the hour, but soon a nameless head amongst familiars; Leander was an outsider.

Listening to the squirrel’s accent, he realized that she may be seen as outsider as well. Leander could feel a small connection to the squirrel, something he had not experienced in some time. Sympathy. He chuckled at the thought. Leander not even spoken to the squirrel maid and already he felt a common link. Leander was about to return to work when he realized that if there was a thief about, it should be his job to at least look into it so he could give Friar Julian an account of who to look for should the thief strike again.

Taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly, Leander attempted to banish his reluctance before it got the better of him. Better speak up now.

“E-excuse me,” he stumbled, immediately he felt stupid, but reassured himself and tried to take on a more confident tone. “What was that about a…err…thief?”

[Django]

"E-excuse me,” he stumbled, immediately he felt stupid, but reassured himself and tried to take on a more confident tone. “What was that about a…err…thief?”

Alne whirled around in surprise. She hadn't really been expecting an answer, much least another beast in the kitchens besides the friar. With a mild blush on her face, she noticed the speaker was a rather uncomfortable-looking otter.

"Ach, ah dinnae see ye thar!" she cried, getting a bit flustered. Her big, fluffy tail twitched like crazy behind her as she tried to regain her composure. And failed. It was then she remembered what the otter has said. "Oh, eh, aye, lad, somebeast's stole meh fresh apple pie, ye ken? Ah dinnae know who."

It occurred to her that it would be simple enough to bake another pie, but Alne was not one to tolerate thieves. And, if she was not mistaken, this otter wanted to help with the case.

"Me name's Alne, by th' way," she added, really hoping her blush had disappeared. Even though her dark fur hid the red color well enough, she still felt embarrassed.

[Promatera]

"Ach, ah dinnae see ye thar!" she cried, getting a bit flustered. Her big, fluffy tail twitched like crazy behind her as she tried to regain her composure. And failed.

Right away Leander could tell he surprised Alne and became quite embarrassed himself. He did not mean to surprise her, but already the conversation was off on the wrong foot.

“Sorry…” he muttered averting his gaze. At this moment, Leander had never wished more fervently to just vanish. Growing tense, Leander grabbed one of his whiskers and began to nibble on it.

"Oh, eh, aye, lad, somebeast's stole meh fresh apple pie, ye ken? Ah dinnae know who."

Hopping back onto the subject of the stolen pie Leander returned his gaze to Alne. He struck a somewhat comical appearance as he stared blankly at her, but he was too busy reflecting to notice. Leander had become lost in the swirling movement of his mind as questions to ask her about the theft violently collided with his desire to just drop the whole thing. Unfocused and in conflict, Leander could feel his anxiety rising.

"Me name's Alne, by th' way," she added, really hoping her blush had disappeared. Even though her dark fur hid the red color well enough, she still felt embarrassed.

Suddenly Leander was brought back down to Redwall as he realized he had not yet introduced himself. He snapped back to reality as if waking from a trance and quickly replied,
“Leander,” As his mind came into focus he then added, “Uh…Leander is my name.”

As he thought of what to say next his eyes darted towards the ceiling and he continued to chew on his whiskers. “So…where did you last see the pie?” he asked finally removing the whiskers from his mouth and returning his gaze. He spoke quietly in attempt to calm her and himself.

[Django]

"Sorry..."

Alne shook her head. "Nae, lad, there's nae need tae be sorry," she said, finally getting herself under control. "Ach, the noo, 'tis allas beasts en th' kitchens."

“Leander,” As his mind came into focus he then added, “Uh…Leander is my name.”

"Leahndehr?" Alne repeated curiously, unintentionally butchering the nice name with her accent. "Ah've seen ye 'round, haen't I?" Seeing as they both lived in the same abbey, as far as she knew, it was safe to assume she'd seen this otter before. Though she couldn't rightly recall any otters who nervously chewed on their whiskers.

"So…where did you last see the pie?” he asked finally removing the whiskers from his mouth and returning his gaze.

"Ach, jus' naow," she replied, glancing icily at the windowsill again. "Ah put et on th' window, an' ah turn meh back fer one moment. Nex' thin' ah know, 'tis gone."

[Onyxwing]

Onyxwing was greatly enjoying the pie courtesy of the windowsill. The flying squirrel had stolen it when the squirrel wasn't looking and was hiding in the thick cover of the orchard. He heard some commotion in the kitchen and assumed his ruse was discovered blame it on the little ones that's what they'll do! Onyxwing thought to himself. He had recently snuck into the grand red stone abbey by gliding from a tree and to the walltop. Not that he didn't like the Redwallers, the pie was just to tempting! He heard something about the cook not hearing someone behind them and he threw an apple at the bushes below the windowsill. That should make them look below, then I can see how long it will take for them to find me! This little game of hide and seek would be fun indeed!

[Promatera]

"Nae, lad, there's nae need tae be sorry," she said, finally getting herself under control.

Leander was greatly relieved by this and felt his distress begin to dissipate. It was then he remembered that he was terrible at remembering names so he began to recite Alne's name in his head so that he would not forget it.

"Leahndehr?" Alne repeated curiously, unintentionally butchering the nice name with her accent. "Ah've seen ye 'round, haen't I?"

Being recognized made Leander feel more comfortable and slowly he felt himself loosening up a bit. The tension he had experienced earlier was slowly vanishing. "Aye...er yes!" he replied accidentally slipping into slang. "I'm usually around...doing things...working," he added eyes darting left and back at Alne as he tried to make his life seem more interesting.

"So…where did you last see the pie?” he asked finally removing the whiskers from his mouth and returning his gaze.

"Ach, jus' naow," she replied, glancing icily at the windowsill again. "Ah put et on th' window, an' ah turn meh back fer one moment. Nex' thin' ah know, 'tis gone."

Leander looked towards the window, "Y'mean over...here?" he asked. Leander moved closer and was surprised to find little evidence left of any pie. He looked outside from the window and saw little that would draw suspicion. It was becoming a fine day and the beasts working outdoors had no evidence of ever having a pie. He looked below him just in case the pie could have fallen and only noticed some bushes.

"I suppose it's possible that...er...the pie could have fallen in the bushes?" Leander said returning to Alne, but beginning to doubt his solution as soon as he said it. "We could check, b-but only if you think we should!" He added quickly not wanting to force his answer on Alne. The thought of looking stupid after finding nothing in the bushes was not appealing to Leander.

[Django]

"I suppose it's possible that...er...the pie could have fallen in the bushes?" Leander said returning to Alne, but beginning to doubt his solution as soon as he said it. "We could check, b-but only if you think we should!"

Alne wasn't paying attention anymore. Her tall, tufted ears flicked in the direction of a curious sound. Rustling leaves. Perhaps the culprit and the pie were in the bushes. She jumped back onto the windowsill and leapt off, landing perfectly balanced on the ground below. Suddenly remembering Leander, she called up through the window, "Did ye 'ear tha', lad?"

She dove into the bushes, searching for any evidence of a pie thief. All she found, however, was a solitary apple. It was badly bruised on one side. Obviously it had been thrown this way to divert their attention. Alne whirled to face the rest of the abbey grounds. Where had the apple come from?

"Come oot a' ye bonneh 'idin', ye grea' pie thief," she called. She was fully aware of the innocent abbey-goers giving her odd looks as they passed, but the pie mystery was a more pressing matter. "Leandehr, come oot a' th' kitchens an' look." The black squirrel studied the apple carefully, and then scanned the nearby grounds.

[Onyxwing]

Onyxwing watched the two make their way outside, and as the black squirrel looked his way, the flying squirel clung to the tree branch. He was covered in camoflauge so that would probably help, but the mystery of where the apple came from wouldn't remain a secret much longer. Apples grow in apple trees. Just like the one he was on currently. Even if they do find me I doubt they can fly or ever seen the likes of a squirrel that could! he thought as he peered out of the shadows of the orchard. The pie had been well worth this little escapade. I really must complement that squirrel when I get the chance! He thought.

[Promatera]

Stunned by this new development and that his advice was useful, Leander remained motionless for a moment.

"Leandehr, come oot a' th' kitchens an' look." The black squirrel studied the apple carefully, and then scanned the nearby grounds.

Snapping back to his senses, Leander carefully crawled through the window and landed outside the abbey. Closely following Alne, Leander did his best to keep the odd stares from the abbey dwellers out of his head, but could not help feeling somewhat silly. Suddenly he realized he was helping the abbey and what could be silly about that?

Reassured Leander stood at Alne's side as she scanned the grounds for clues. As Alne looked about the grounds, Leander studied the apple that had been found in the bushes beneath the window. The apple looked very fresh and juicy. As far as where the apple came from Leander figured it had either been snatched from the larder or it came fresh off the tree. However, the apple could not have been snatched from the larder without someone noticing so perhaps...

"Er...Alne?" he asked, looking towards the trees surrounding the abbey. "Do you think that the apple may have come one of the apple trees in the orchards?" he continued.

[Django]

"Er...Alne?" he asked, looking towards the trees surrounding the abbey. "Do you think that the apple may have come one of the apple trees in the orchards?" he continued.

Alne immediately turned her attention to the orchards upon the otter's suggestion. "Aye, 'tis a good place tae look, mah friend," she replied. Locating the nearest apple tree, and judging the distance from it to the kitchen window, she guessed the culprit must have taken his apple from this tree.

Carefully analyzing the tree branches with her eyes, she figured a more thorough search was in order. Shimmying up the trunk with all the grace and speed of a genuine climber, Alne began her search. Suddenly, a flash of dark fur caught her eye, and she lunged for it, ready to give this pie thief a piece of her mind, and perhaps a bruise or two if they fell out of the tree.

[Promatera]

"Aye, 'tis a good place tae look, mah friend," she replied.

Friend. Leander had not heard this word used to refer to him in some time. Slowly he felt his lips curve into a small smile. He felt happy.

As the two reached the orchards, Leander watched as Alne made several glances towards the abbey and back towards the trees. He was astonished as she easily picked out a tree and began to climb it in search of the culprit. Higher, higher, and higher Alne climbed, Leander was impressed by her climbing skills, but then again she was a squirrel. For a moment she seemed to pause as if looking for something. He wondered if she must have seen something. Suddenly in a flash she leapt for something Leander could not identify.

"Alne!" he shouted shocked by her powerful lunge. He began to feel distressed. Leander wanted to do something for his new friend, but there was little he could do.

[Onyxwing]

As soon as Onyxwing saw the black squirrel running forward, he got ready to dive. Just as the squirrel grabbed him, Onyxwing rolled forward out of the tree and opened his wing flaps. this should give them something to think about! the Flying Squirrel thought as he glided to the ground next to the otter. With the impressive feat of back fliping over the otter's head and tugging his rudder, Onyxwing lied rather well
"Why are you trying to catch me! Don't you know I am the legendary Wendingo?"

Hopefully they've never seen a flying squirrel Onyxwing thought. His kind were secretive enough so he hoped they hadn't. "Thanks for the pie by the way!" He called as he raced up the wall steps. He wasn't leaving the Abbey yet, maybe he would stay for supper, WHEN He escaped these two.

[Django]

Alne let out a cry as the creature slipped from her grasp. She tumbled through the air, managing to catch hold of a tree limb, stopping her plummet towards earth. Righting herself on the limb, she watched as the curious flying creature zoomed away. Well, at least she'd guessed the right tree.

Hot indignation burned in her chest as the black squirrel watched the culprit glide out of reach. She snorted and descended the apple tree with the speed and grace of the natural climber she was. "Ach, th' wee beastie were in mah paws," she huffed angrily, mostly to herself.

"Thanks for the pie by the way!"

Alne's normally long fuse was suddenly set off by the comment. Maybe it had been her busy morning. Maybe it had been the shock of the missing pie. Maybe it had been allowing the culprit to slip from her paws. Either way, this was the last straw. "Coom an' say that tae mah face, ye wee, bonneh rascal!!" she yelled, scaling the wall steps after the dark creature. "Ye needed only wait fer lunch, but, no, ye 'ad tae go an' take one a' th' bonneh pies ah made special!"

To the infuriated squirrel, it really didn't matter what this curious creature was. It needed to end here.

[Promatera]

What happened next seemed to flash before Leander's eyes. A creature he had never seen before seemed to fly out of Alne's grasp. Stunned by this impressive feat he was caught off guard as he saw the creature flying towards him. Before he could act the creature flew straight over him and yanked his rudder-like tail.

"Why are you trying to catch me! Don't you know I am the legendary Wendingo?"

Wendingo? Leander was stumped by this. If he was legendary why had he never heard of him? Questions aside the thief was escaping! Leander was committed now and he was going to make sure that this "Wendingo" would never steal from Alne and Leander again, although, Leander had no idea how he would do this. He began to worry that things would come to violence.

"Ach, th' wee beastie were in mah paws," she huffed angrily, mostly to herself.

"S-stay calm," Leander spoke softly trying to calm Alne down. Leander noticed that she seemed to be on edge. He could relate. "W-we can do this," he said this to Alne, but this was also directed towards himself as he tried to feel more confident. "We just need-"

"Thanks for the pie by the way!"

Unfortunately, his attempt to calm Alne had come too late as "Wendingo" easily provoked Alne into a fit of rage. Leander was at a loss as she charged after him.

"Coom an' say that tae mah face, ye wee, bonneh rascal!!" she yelled, scaling the wall steps after the dark creature.

"W-wait!" Leander yelled as he tried to catch up to Alne. At this rate Leander felt they would never catch the flying squirrel. They needed a plan.

[Onyxwing]

Onyxwing ran a down to about half the wall length.

"Are you sure I can't apologize?" He called to the chasing squirrel. "Having annother pie for supper appeals to me!" With that he jumped off the wall and into the Abbey grounds, parachuting with his wing flaps. He looked at the berserk squirrel and figured his appeals would fall better on the otter.

"Could you help me with the problem I'm having kind sir?" He said as he stopped just out of reach from the otter "This squirrel seems to want to kill me over a simple pie!" He got ready to dodge any lunges the otter might make. And kept an eye on the squirrel. "And if you help me, I might share just what I am!" I sure hope he's the curious type Onyxwing thought.

[Onyxwing]

Onyxwing ran a down to about half the wall length.

"Are you sure I can't apologize?" He called to the chasing squirrel. "Having annother pie for supper appeals to me!" With that he jumped off the wall and into the Abbey grounds, parachuting with his wing flaps. He looked at the berserk squirrel and figured his appeals would fall better on the otter.

"Could you help me with the problem I'm having, kind sir?" He said as he stopped just out of reach from the otter "This squirrel seems to want to kill me over a simple pie!" He got ready to dodge any lunges the otter might make. And kept an eye on the squirrel. "And if you help me, I might share just what I am!" I sure hope he's the curious type Onyxwing thought.

[Django]

"Are you sure I can't apologize?" He called to the chasing squirrel. "Having annother pie for supper appeals to me!"

Alne skidded to a halt as the creature took off. "Aye, ye'd do well tae apologize, ye grea' auld thief!" she called. Once the culprit was out of her reach again, she paused to catch her breath. A pie wasn't really worth all this trouble, was it? No, but she did not want a food thief roaming Redwall much longer. In a much calmer tone, she yelled out, "All ye need do is ask meh if ye want pie, ye ken? Ah doon't deny no starvin' beastie a bite tae eat!"

((Ugh, short.))

[Promatera]

"Could you help me with the problem I'm having, kind sir?"

Again Leander was surprised by this "Wendingo." Why would he fly to him and ask him questions? Suddenly it dawned on him that this could be the best opportunity to catch the creature.

"This squirrel seems to want to kill me over a simple pie!" He got ready to dodge any lunges the otter might make. And kept an eye on the squirrel. "And if you help me, I might share just what I am!"

Leander thought for a moment as he pondered over the question. Leander and Alne had been playing "Wendingo's" game all morning and it had gone on long enough. He seemed to reach an answer he took a deep breath and said

"W-well I don't know." Putting his paw to his mouth he thought quickly and added, "at least not yet." He looked to Alne who was clearly just as tired as him before pressing on, "Are you sure if I help you you will tell me who you are?"

[Onyxwing]

"W-well I don't know." Putting his paw to his mouth he thought quickly and added, "at least not yet." He looked to Alne who was clearly just as tired as him before pressing on, "Are you sure if I help you you will tell me who you are?"

"If It means I get lunch at this fine Abbey, yes, I will tell you who and what I am!" Onyxwing said. He was right, this otter was the curious type. And hopefully would provide a decent shield against the raging black squirrel. He had to admire the squirrel for chasing him all this way, but hopefully after that long run she wouldn't have energy enough to chase him down. He turned to the otter

"By the way, what is for lunch anyway?"